Alright people, right off the bat let's clear something up. Most of what you see on "reality" TV is exactly the opposite of what reality is. It's less fake in the sense that some of what happens is real, but a lot of the people doing the real things are fake, so do those cancel each other out?
All that to say, I love "reality" TV. It's my shame, my guilty pleasure, my call-it-what-you-wanna-call-it. Is it trash? Arguably. Is it mindless? Happily so. But does it teach us? You bet. Teaches us great things about how not to act, what not to wear, who we should be glad we aren't, and most importantly, it teaches us that you cannot find love on a show that orchestrates outrageous never-to-be-topped dates with lots of booze, food, and confusing conversation (minus trista and ryan, the superhuman anomalies to this equation).
And yet. I love it. I do. I hang on Chris Harrison's every word. I hope for victories, cling to the small hope that one day the whole messed up shenanigan will provide a victorious couple by SOMEONE picking Chris L. from Cape Cod. Hoooow is he still single? Oh that's right, he went home to be with his mother for the last year before she died. Ladies. GET. ON. THAT.
Moving on, to a different type of "reality" TV which I think hits the closer to actual reality mark. SYTYCD. don't know what that means? Google that. or just read on and use your deductive reasoning skillz to figure out what I'm talking about. These kids can dance. They also are forced to dance in different genres, some that they've never even heard of. they have to do it live. that's intense. and it's cool. and it's art. One particular pair did a dance tonight honoring the choreographer's sick mother. it moved the audience, the host, the judges, and I to tears. that's what true art does- moves.
So we've got 2 ends of the spectrum. "reality" reality...and reality. why not have a little bit of both and enjoy the imaginative world that both have to offer?
why thank you, I just think I might.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Monday, September 07, 2009
fall...ish
apparently i am a seasonal blog writer...
thus, a new season has started in my life and it's not only climate related. i have started my first "true" teaching job (i say that only because being a long-term sub, while many of the responsibilities are the same, is still less pressure/long-term responsibility than being in a stable, year-long position). i think i love it. i think i'm still in the getting used to it phase. however, based on the way the first two weeks have gone, they are just going to get better. the first one was difficult, this last one was much better. there are just so many things you have to learn, being a teacher (ironic...yet in a way, also makes sense, no?). things related to the kids, dynamics of classes (that can fluctuate from one class to another so polarly), and then there's the whole administrative side, meetings, duties, paperwork, etc. it's a lot to get a groove into. but teaching is infinitely unique in its "never the same day twice" construction and of course, the feeling that you've truly changed somebody's life just because you were interested in who they were. that's mainly why i do it. also, summers off. just sayin. built in vacation time.
this past weekend, i did something many of my fellow OU alumni might scowl at me for. i kind of became, in an honorary sense, a Texas Aggie. i got to go to first yell and see Jeff Dunham perform (the ventriloquist...Achmed the dead terrorist...good stuff) and then i got to go to Midnight Yell, where the yell leaders lead a practice of all the yells the Aggies do at games. it's basically a big pep rally, except better, because people actually go and it actually does pep you up!
the game itself was an adventure. our seats were great, almost the middle of the field at the back of the second deck. however, A&M has a little known "bat sanctuary" up there were the third deck hangs over about 10 feet of the second deck...right above our heads. when the game started and things started getting loud, we were caught in the middle of a serious bat exodus, and while kind of cool, it was also kind of eerie to have spastic bats flying mere centimeters over your head. as far as football was concerned, the Aggies did pretty great, considering their recent years of lack-luster seasons (barring the T.U. games of course)and they beat UNM soundly, 41 to something lesser than that. quite lesser, i believe. it was very exciting and i will say that they have some of the most dedicated, energetic (if not the most) student fans in college football. the intensity never changes from start to finish. and that is a feat, one that i cannot claim from my time at Owen Field.
Yes, love will make you do crazy things, like partially give up your own allegiance to your alma mater (though i did follow the OU game on my phone pretty hecticly as it was winding down) and claim devotion for a "conference rival". but i say, it was bound to happen at some point what with my grandfather having graduated from there in 1938 and my brother going down there for school this year. i just happened to find another very good reason first- my boyfriend.
and there ya have it folks.
thus, a new season has started in my life and it's not only climate related. i have started my first "true" teaching job (i say that only because being a long-term sub, while many of the responsibilities are the same, is still less pressure/long-term responsibility than being in a stable, year-long position). i think i love it. i think i'm still in the getting used to it phase. however, based on the way the first two weeks have gone, they are just going to get better. the first one was difficult, this last one was much better. there are just so many things you have to learn, being a teacher (ironic...yet in a way, also makes sense, no?). things related to the kids, dynamics of classes (that can fluctuate from one class to another so polarly), and then there's the whole administrative side, meetings, duties, paperwork, etc. it's a lot to get a groove into. but teaching is infinitely unique in its "never the same day twice" construction and of course, the feeling that you've truly changed somebody's life just because you were interested in who they were. that's mainly why i do it. also, summers off. just sayin. built in vacation time.
this past weekend, i did something many of my fellow OU alumni might scowl at me for. i kind of became, in an honorary sense, a Texas Aggie. i got to go to first yell and see Jeff Dunham perform (the ventriloquist...Achmed the dead terrorist...good stuff) and then i got to go to Midnight Yell, where the yell leaders lead a practice of all the yells the Aggies do at games. it's basically a big pep rally, except better, because people actually go and it actually does pep you up!
the game itself was an adventure. our seats were great, almost the middle of the field at the back of the second deck. however, A&M has a little known "bat sanctuary" up there were the third deck hangs over about 10 feet of the second deck...right above our heads. when the game started and things started getting loud, we were caught in the middle of a serious bat exodus, and while kind of cool, it was also kind of eerie to have spastic bats flying mere centimeters over your head. as far as football was concerned, the Aggies did pretty great, considering their recent years of lack-luster seasons (barring the T.U. games of course)and they beat UNM soundly, 41 to something lesser than that. quite lesser, i believe. it was very exciting and i will say that they have some of the most dedicated, energetic (if not the most) student fans in college football. the intensity never changes from start to finish. and that is a feat, one that i cannot claim from my time at Owen Field.
Yes, love will make you do crazy things, like partially give up your own allegiance to your alma mater (though i did follow the OU game on my phone pretty hecticly as it was winding down) and claim devotion for a "conference rival". but i say, it was bound to happen at some point what with my grandfather having graduated from there in 1938 and my brother going down there for school this year. i just happened to find another very good reason first- my boyfriend.
and there ya have it folks.
Monday, July 13, 2009
summer
this summer has gone by faster than any other summer i've ever experienced....even my summers at camp, and my summer in Espana. i think it has something to do with getting older...and losing track of time....
this summer has been AWESOME. i have managed to:
-get my first, real, big girl job.
-own my first video game system (a Wii, purchased to celebrate first, real, big girl job).
-see my boyfriend often= awesome.
-spend good time with friends and family.
-start saving money.
some things i'd like to do with the rest of the summer...well actually, besides continuing to spend time with family and friends, see my boyfriend and play my Wii, the one thing I'd like to accomplish is TRULY getting my room clean. it remains to be seen if this dream will actually come to fruition. and i am also starting my first scrapbook.
i am so glad that i own The Office on dvd. it is the "comfort food" of tv for me. i also really like sleeping, i've discovered.
my life is good, i'm feeling good, and i am grateful to the good Lord above because i am one blessed girl.
this summer has been AWESOME. i have managed to:
-get my first, real, big girl job.
-own my first video game system (a Wii, purchased to celebrate first, real, big girl job).
-see my boyfriend often= awesome.
-spend good time with friends and family.
-start saving money.
some things i'd like to do with the rest of the summer...well actually, besides continuing to spend time with family and friends, see my boyfriend and play my Wii, the one thing I'd like to accomplish is TRULY getting my room clean. it remains to be seen if this dream will actually come to fruition. and i am also starting my first scrapbook.
i am so glad that i own The Office on dvd. it is the "comfort food" of tv for me. i also really like sleeping, i've discovered.
my life is good, i'm feeling good, and i am grateful to the good Lord above because i am one blessed girl.
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
uncomplicated
i wonder how long i've been making some things in my life, whether big or small, more complicated than they should be.
i will be the first to admit that i am an over-thinker. oh Lord, am i an over-thinker. only very recently have i tried to reign this issue in and get disciplined. over-thinking makes things complicated.
i also have discovered i spend a lot of time thinking of really complicated ways to do things simply to save a little time or a little money. what ends up happening is i stress myself out because the "saving time and money way" is actually way more difficult and not at all worth it, therefore often making the situation very complicated.
another teacher who has become my mentor of sorts gave me this book called "100 ways to simplify your life," and i've been reading through it. its been good and humbling...because as much as i would like to say that i am not a really complicated person (that may sometimes be true) i also can be very complicated in certain aspects.
today i decided that i would try making an errand i had to run a little more simple. normally, when i have to go to campus, i park in our campus corner which is a bit of a walk from the place i needed to go, but it only costs a quarter to park there for an hour. what has never failed to happen is that i get to campus corner, and i have no quarter. so i spend 10 minutes digging through my purse, car, looking in the street, to find a silly quarter. by the time i do that, i now have to walk half a mile to get to the building i'm going to. so i go there, and inevitably, there's a hitch in getting the things i need to get- i haven't paid my bursar bill, i haven't signed something, etc. etc. then, i usually end up having to go to another office to get something else i need, because everything isn't in one place. now, as i am sitting in the waiting area, i'm stressing because my meter is about to run out and i'm gonna have to book it to get back so that i don't get a ticket.
ridiculous right? especially when i could just say you know what, i will save myself some trouble, not worry about finding a spot or a quarter, park in the garage on campus, and i bet it will be worth the 2 or 3 dollars i'll have to pay to do that.
and you know what?
it was.
i was close to where i needed to be. i wasn't worried about a meter running out. the people i talked to were very helpful (and you know i may have only noticed this because i wasn't so occupied with my own stress levels!!) and THEN, when i went to pay for my parking, the girl let me go through without paying because i'd just barely stayed over 15 minutes (under that is free). so i'm not saying that because i chose to "simplify" that i'm always going to get free parking- no, i think it was just to show me that things don't have to be stressful when they actually aren't, and that i shouldn't waste so much time worrying about stuff that isn't worth worrying over.
the Lord is so kind about showing me these things. love it.
i will be the first to admit that i am an over-thinker. oh Lord, am i an over-thinker. only very recently have i tried to reign this issue in and get disciplined. over-thinking makes things complicated.
i also have discovered i spend a lot of time thinking of really complicated ways to do things simply to save a little time or a little money. what ends up happening is i stress myself out because the "saving time and money way" is actually way more difficult and not at all worth it, therefore often making the situation very complicated.
another teacher who has become my mentor of sorts gave me this book called "100 ways to simplify your life," and i've been reading through it. its been good and humbling...because as much as i would like to say that i am not a really complicated person (that may sometimes be true) i also can be very complicated in certain aspects.
today i decided that i would try making an errand i had to run a little more simple. normally, when i have to go to campus, i park in our campus corner which is a bit of a walk from the place i needed to go, but it only costs a quarter to park there for an hour. what has never failed to happen is that i get to campus corner, and i have no quarter. so i spend 10 minutes digging through my purse, car, looking in the street, to find a silly quarter. by the time i do that, i now have to walk half a mile to get to the building i'm going to. so i go there, and inevitably, there's a hitch in getting the things i need to get- i haven't paid my bursar bill, i haven't signed something, etc. etc. then, i usually end up having to go to another office to get something else i need, because everything isn't in one place. now, as i am sitting in the waiting area, i'm stressing because my meter is about to run out and i'm gonna have to book it to get back so that i don't get a ticket.
ridiculous right? especially when i could just say you know what, i will save myself some trouble, not worry about finding a spot or a quarter, park in the garage on campus, and i bet it will be worth the 2 or 3 dollars i'll have to pay to do that.
and you know what?
it was.
i was close to where i needed to be. i wasn't worried about a meter running out. the people i talked to were very helpful (and you know i may have only noticed this because i wasn't so occupied with my own stress levels!!) and THEN, when i went to pay for my parking, the girl let me go through without paying because i'd just barely stayed over 15 minutes (under that is free). so i'm not saying that because i chose to "simplify" that i'm always going to get free parking- no, i think it was just to show me that things don't have to be stressful when they actually aren't, and that i shouldn't waste so much time worrying about stuff that isn't worth worrying over.
the Lord is so kind about showing me these things. love it.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
life
life is hard.
life is good.
life is hard, and good, and wonderful, and overwhelming, and so many other things all at the same time.
I am realizing more and more that I am a broken soul, glued back together by grace of God, fragile, still healing, and constantly learning, striving toward something that I can't see but I know is there.
but I am also so afraid. and weak.
yet I'm promised strength in my weakness.
"Lord, help me find it. Help me find You."
this song has gotten me through many nights for years, actually, when I couldn't pray the words myself.
Whisper to Me- Warren Barfield
I lay down and I close my eyes
but I won't go to sleep tonight
there's too much on my mind
Holy God, You seem to be
twice as far away from me
as You have ever been before
Hold me safely in Your arms
and clear my crowded mind
whisper words of peace
in the dark, whisper to me
oh, whisper
I'm afraid but they don't know it
I feel so weak but I can't show it
so here I lay, cryin out with tears
Hold my gently in Your arms
and calm my beating heart
whisper words of hope in the dark
whisper to me
Whisper, make the day sleep
make the noise cease
give me peace
whisper to me
I need to hear You whisper,
whisper to me
Hold me gently in Your arms
and calm my beating heart
whisper words of hope
in the dark, whisper
to me, words of hope
words of peace
whisper to me
life is good.
life is hard, and good, and wonderful, and overwhelming, and so many other things all at the same time.
I am realizing more and more that I am a broken soul, glued back together by grace of God, fragile, still healing, and constantly learning, striving toward something that I can't see but I know is there.
but I am also so afraid. and weak.
yet I'm promised strength in my weakness.
"Lord, help me find it. Help me find You."
this song has gotten me through many nights for years, actually, when I couldn't pray the words myself.
Whisper to Me- Warren Barfield
I lay down and I close my eyes
but I won't go to sleep tonight
there's too much on my mind
Holy God, You seem to be
twice as far away from me
as You have ever been before
Hold me safely in Your arms
and clear my crowded mind
whisper words of peace
in the dark, whisper to me
oh, whisper
I'm afraid but they don't know it
I feel so weak but I can't show it
so here I lay, cryin out with tears
Hold my gently in Your arms
and calm my beating heart
whisper words of hope in the dark
whisper to me
Whisper, make the day sleep
make the noise cease
give me peace
whisper to me
I need to hear You whisper,
whisper to me
Hold me gently in Your arms
and calm my beating heart
whisper words of hope
in the dark, whisper
to me, words of hope
words of peace
whisper to me
Friday, April 03, 2009
sighs of relief
i'll tell you something.
sometimes, in my own secret places in my heart, it is very very ugly. unbecoming. and i hate it when those places come out. but there's good news. a lot of times the Lord BRINGS those places out so that Light can be shown on them and HE can make them more like Him, which in turn, makes them a little more beautiful. thank. the. Lord.
Romans 8:37 says "But in ALL these things we can overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loves us." (emphasis mine). wow. we don't just get by, we don't just say "well i guess i have to live with this" or "it's just the way it is"...no, we OVERWHELMINGLY conquer through Christ. isn't that SWEET!?
"It is precisely there, in the heat of the fire, we are to glorify Him. We do this by exercising perfect faith in His goodness and love that has permitted this trial to come upon us. Even more we are to believe that out of the fire will arise something more worthy of praise to Him than had we never experienced it. To go through some fires will take great faith, for little faith will fail. We must win the victory IN IT." -Margaret Bottome
"You are much neater healed than you would have been well." -Beth Moore
the Lord is all about glory and purpose, not meaningless or haphazard.
sometimes, in my own secret places in my heart, it is very very ugly. unbecoming. and i hate it when those places come out. but there's good news. a lot of times the Lord BRINGS those places out so that Light can be shown on them and HE can make them more like Him, which in turn, makes them a little more beautiful. thank. the. Lord.
Romans 8:37 says "But in ALL these things we can overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loves us." (emphasis mine). wow. we don't just get by, we don't just say "well i guess i have to live with this" or "it's just the way it is"...no, we OVERWHELMINGLY conquer through Christ. isn't that SWEET!?
"It is precisely there, in the heat of the fire, we are to glorify Him. We do this by exercising perfect faith in His goodness and love that has permitted this trial to come upon us. Even more we are to believe that out of the fire will arise something more worthy of praise to Him than had we never experienced it. To go through some fires will take great faith, for little faith will fail. We must win the victory IN IT." -Margaret Bottome
"You are much neater healed than you would have been well." -Beth Moore
the Lord is all about glory and purpose, not meaningless or haphazard.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
the right response
the Lord showed me something HUGE today.
what I love about it is that the big things always seem to come in the smallest, yet greatest whispers.
I've been thinking a lot lately about how thankful I am for the things I have been given in my life. I feel like every day I'm even more awed by the blessings I've received. I've been pretty diligent in having a spirit of thankfulness, because honestly, it's just been over flowing. But I keep thinking that there has to be something more I can do to show and convey my thankfulness to Him...I just didn't know what.
Today in church...there it was. We were talking about the abilities that God has given us, how each of us are "originals"...because God doesn't make copies. So in response to anything good in our life, thankfulness for the things we've been given (we were talking about abilities, but I think it applies to anything) is shown by then going out and LIVING the thankfulness- i.e. using those abilities, or showing the love we've been given, using our gratefulness as an out-pouring onto others. The spiritual response for thankfulness is to SAY it- and the physical response is to LIVE it- to turn that "thankfulness energy" into love, compassion, mercy, grace...because that's what I've been shown.
WOW.
oh, that I would be able to live that.
"faith that moves forward triumphs."
what I love about it is that the big things always seem to come in the smallest, yet greatest whispers.
I've been thinking a lot lately about how thankful I am for the things I have been given in my life. I feel like every day I'm even more awed by the blessings I've received. I've been pretty diligent in having a spirit of thankfulness, because honestly, it's just been over flowing. But I keep thinking that there has to be something more I can do to show and convey my thankfulness to Him...I just didn't know what.
Today in church...there it was. We were talking about the abilities that God has given us, how each of us are "originals"...because God doesn't make copies. So in response to anything good in our life, thankfulness for the things we've been given (we were talking about abilities, but I think it applies to anything) is shown by then going out and LIVING the thankfulness- i.e. using those abilities, or showing the love we've been given, using our gratefulness as an out-pouring onto others. The spiritual response for thankfulness is to SAY it- and the physical response is to LIVE it- to turn that "thankfulness energy" into love, compassion, mercy, grace...because that's what I've been shown.
WOW.
oh, that I would be able to live that.
"faith that moves forward triumphs."
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